I've been sick for five days now. The first two I let slide, thinking I'd just caught Emily's cold. Saturday and Sunday were much worse, but I held off going to the doctor because I wanted to see my regular physician rather than the doc in the box (where I'll wait an hour to see him for 2 minutes just to get a shot). Just now, I called UAB Parkwest to make an appointment. I should point out, for the following conversation to make sense, that there are only two doctors at this particular clinic.
Me: "I'd like to make an apointment for today."
Receptionist: "OK. With which doctor?"
Me: "Dr. Bullock."
Receptionist: "Dr. Bullock is only working a half day today, and he's already booked up."
Me: "Then can I make an appointment with Dr. Copeland?"
Receptionist: "No, Dr. Copeland was on vacation last week, so she's all booked up today."
Me (thinking): Then why the hell didn't you say so in the first place, you nitwit?! Can't you hear that I'm breaking into coughing fits every time I try to speak?!
Me (reality): silence
Receptionist: "Would you like to make an apointment for tomorrow?"