Saturday, December 31, 2005
Apparently, Emily's role in the process was to stir the dip. When I heard this, I immediately asked: "How much landed on the floor?"
"None got on the floor, miraculously enough," Misty told me. "But she did get some on her hands and proceeded to fling them around and cry as if the dip was burning her."
That didn't sound too bad.
Misty continued: "Then at one point, I turned around and she was sticking a huge spoonful of mayonnaise in her mouth, and she shuddered."
"... And then I turned away for a second to put something in the sink, and when I looked back, she was stirring the dip with her pen for the AquaDoodle."
Monday, December 19, 2005
It may not seem like much from my description, but it's really cute.
I can't wait to see how she reacts to ZooLight Safari.
Saturday, December 10, 2005
As we were getting ready for bed last night, Misty and I were talking about classic Sesame Street skits that we remembered from our own childhoods. I mentioned the annual Christmas special where Cookie Monster kept trying to contact Santa, but was thwarted by his own appetite as he ate first his paper and pencil, then his typewriter, and finally his telephone.
Misty then said to me as if it was some sort of revelation, "Have you ever noticed that Cookie Monster doesn't really eat those cookies? They just crumble up and go everwhere, but nothing goes down his throat."
"Yes, dear," I told her. "That's because he's a puppet."
Friday, December 09, 2005
She doesn't exactly count it's more like a series of random vowel sounds. Nevertheless, she has the rhythm down, and it's obvious that she's trying to imitate counting.
Here's the crazy part, though. Misty was counting last night and Emily was making noises along with her. Emily's version went something like this:
"..... Uh... Eh... Uh... Ii... Ee... Ee... Eight... Nine... Ah!"
It blew me away that she knew eight and nine. Not only did she make the right sounds, but she said them in the right place. And she wasn't repeating after Misty, either she was saying the numbers in unison.
We've tried counting several more times since, and usually have the same result.
My kid knows eight and nine!
Thursday, December 08, 2005
These are the stories that are bound to resurface in 15 years or so.
Monday, December 05, 2005
What do y'all think? Is Emily cute enough to justify paying $24.95 a year for unlimited photo storage?
This was the scene when Emily arrived home.
And that's after she'd been washed.
The next day, all the family had to crowd around and stare at Emily's blue butt when whoever was changing her exclaimed, "Oh my God! Look at this diaper!" I won't show you the picture Misty took of it.
Apparently, Emily's wasn't the only one in her class to be afflicted. When I filled out her daily report sheet on Friday, I wrote "blue bottom" in the blank for any new injuries, symptoms, or conditions. When I got the sheet back at the end of the day, the teacher had responded by writing, "everybody."
It took about four scrubbings in the bath before all the blue came off.
Friday, December 02, 2005
Thursday, December 01, 2005
I don't know a concrete day or time yet, other than that it will be before his January 21 performance at the Alys Stephens Center.
Misty seems to think that I can parlay this event into her having lunch with Mo Rocca. I'm not sure that's a good idea considering her admission that she has "a big crush on him."
Friday, November 04, 2005
(It's 8:06 tomorrow morning there, by the way.)
Thursday, November 03, 2005
Other Birmingham bloggers on the panel include:
Jeremy Flint (moderator) of Red Hot & Daily
Anne Glamore (not her real name) of Tales from My Tiny Kingdom
Dmitri Glazkov of his eponymous blog
Terry Oglesby of Possumblog
The meeting will be held in St. Vincents' Bruno Conference Center beginning at 11:30, and panel discussion will run from noon to 1 p.m.
So when I saw the article about pillow fungus in the LifeStyle section of today's Birmingham News, I called her at work to tell her about it.
"Your pillow is 'a cesspool of mold, mildew, fungus, dust mites and mite feces' according to bedding expert Dan Schecter," I told her.
"I know. That's why it's so soft," she said.
"You know, Emily is not going to be the sort of girl who takes well to ballet classes," Misty's mom said last night after spending the day with her grandaughter.
"That's fine," Misty said. "She can take karate if she wants to... so long as they'll let me dress her in pink."
Wednesday, November 02, 2005
I suppose it's understandable that only my immediate family keeps count of the number of months Emily has accumulated in her lifespan. And I know from experience that it can be hard to guess kids' ages. It's not a stupid question, and it never gets tiring talking about my daughter even if it is only to mention her age.
What I find interesting is that you can tell which people don't have children of their own because they don't know where to go from there.
When I answer that Emily is 19 months old, someone without kids will ask: "Is she saying any words yet?"
Saying words? Ppffff! She's more than a year and a half old ' she's been saying words for about eight months! She knows more than 30 words!
Emily's favorite word lately is "no." It doesn't matter what you ask her, the answer will be "no."
"Emily, are you hungry?"
"Do you want to play at the park?"
"Do you love Daddy?"
She doesn't mean no, of course; she just knows that it's the answer to a question. So since we know how she's going to answer, we've had to get creative with the way we ask questions.
"Emily, do you want to stay in that wet diaper?"
"Are you planning on throwing your peas on the floor?"
"Is there anyone you love more than Daddy?"
I feel so clever to have outsmarted my 19-month-old kid.
Tuesday, November 01, 2005
Monday, October 31, 2005
Creepy huh? You know, there are more famous rats out there than you'd think.
Rodent activity in our kitchen has increased dramatically since Orkin came out last week. Misty suggested that they must have sprayed the place with cheese. I'm pretty annoyed with the situation, but she is really on the warpath. Since finding evidence (read: droppings) that the rat had been on Emily's high chair, the gloves have come off. Misty has vowed that she will catch the rat by Wednesday. She went out today and bought steel wool, foam sealant, poison, and more traps. Plus Orkin is coming back tomorrow.
In my opinion, we shouldn't be buying any poison or traps. With as much as Orkin charges, they need get in there and find that critter. Their services are supposed to be guaranteed, after all.
My idea is to use infared goggles to spot rodent heat signatures in the walls and shoot them right through the plaster. Of course, I don't have infared goggles or a gun.
Wednesday, October 26, 2005
For the past couple days this week, I've been hearing noise coming from under the refridgerator. Since there was a mouse in the grill this summer and we've seen dead mice in the driveway a few times (courtesy of other neighborhood cats, not the aforementioned deserter), it wasn't a stretch for me to guess that we had mice living under our fridge.
I got a coat hanger and swivled it around, but all that came out was a plastic lid and a bunch of dust bunnies. No mice came out, though. I ignored the noise and went to bed.
Yesterday I was getting set to mow the lawn when I heard the sounds again. I hadn't put too much effort into my search before because Misty had been standing there, and I knew she'd freak out if a mouse ran across the floor (it sure was funny when she discovered the one in the grill, but she's refused to use the grill ever since). This time, though, I was home by myself and feeling a little more determined.
I pulled the fridge out from the wall. As I did, a rat ran out. To me (who did not expect to see a rat), he seemed huge, though I'm sure he's not as hefty in reality as I now imagine him in my head. He scampered across the kitchen floor and up under the edge of the cabinets below the sink (where I assume there's a hole, but I'll be damned if I'm going to stick my head down there to check).
Now I understand why Misty has refused to use the grill. For the rest of the day, I did my best to avoid the kitchen. When I did go in there, I made sure I was wearing jeans and thick, leather, rat-stomping shoes. Misty wanted to cook chili for dinner, but I insisted on going out to eat instead. When she asked if I'd wash the dishes for her, I refused. I'm not hanging around in that kitchen if it's not absolutely necessary.
Like the image of the rat in my head, I know that my cautions are unnecessary. I know he's not going to come out while I'm around unless (like before) I start to uproot his home. I know all the crap about "he's more afraid of you than you are of him." Let's just call it even. I'm not scared of rats, I'm scared of a live, free-roaming, wild rat in my kitchen.
On the bright side, I don't think it's been there for very long. Not only have I never heard it before this week, we've never seen any droppings before this morning. Hopefully, this is just one rodent who snuck in to escape the cold.
Orkin is headed over this morning. Their coverage includes roaches, ants, fleas, spiders, earwigs, centipedes, etc. in addition to rodents, so that sounded pretty good to me. It's funny; one roach or even one roach every week wouldn't prompt me to call an exterminator. I'd just put out bait and make sure the house was cleaner. But one rat, and that whole do-it-yourself attitude goes out the window. I'm not messing with this.
If you'll excuse me, I'm off to watch The Secret of Nimh while I wait for Orkin to arrive.
Friday, October 21, 2005
Basically this means I'll be responsible for more editorial coordination of the site and I'll have a bigger role as a liason with al.com's affiliate newspapers. There are other duties too, of course, but considering that most people, upon hearing that I work for al.com, assume either that I write for The Birmingham News or that I work for AOL (neither of which is the case), I figure you people are confused enough without me trying to go into detail.
And though it has nothing to do with the promotion, I also earned another benefit at my job this week. Since I've reaced my seven-year anniversary with my company, I now get 20 vacation days per year. It's weird to think that I may actually encounter difficulty in using that much vacation time, but rest assured I will find a way.
Thursday, October 20, 2005
When Misty and I arrived after work, we collected Emily and headed out back to the playground were the festivities were taking place. There was a moon walk, a dj and all sorts of games for kids. Emily received a paper lunch bag with her name on it for Halloween treats, but instead of putting candy in her bag, she preferred to run around putting her bag into the buckets of candy. She had her own system. In fact, running around was pretty much all we did at the event as Misty and I wove in and out between other parents and children, frantically trying to keep pace with our little bundle of energy.
At one point, Emily decided she was going to try the plastic bowling game, but again, she had her own way of doing things. Instead of rolling the ball, she'd just run up, grab a pin (knocking down the other pins in the process), and run off with it. Once Misty was successful in capturing Emily and returning the pin to the game, Emily would begin the cycle anew.
Several times Emily stepped up to the entrance of the moon walk, gazing wide-eyed at her friends inside. When we tried to get her inside it, though, she had a coniption. It seems that her love for the moon walk rivals her love for the swing set at Cahaba Lily Park.
It only took about 30 minutes before the task of chasing after Emily grew weary. There was a painting station at the festival in which Emily showed keen interest, and we didn't want to press our luck for too long. We tried eating a burger, but it was nearly impossible with a kid who wanted to simultaneously eat, run, play games, and be held by her mommy. I was amazed that I manged to emerge from the event unscathed by red punch.
Afterward, we stopped across the street to visit Misty's mom, but Emily chose (and I use that word intentionally) to have a crying fit. She's so advanced to have entered her terrible twos six months early. We left after less than five minutes because nothing was convincing her to calm down.
At home, at least, she was much better behaved. She ate most of her dinner and used the fork all by herself. Luckily the dinner-bath-books-bed routine has held up rather well for us, but I wonder how much longer it will be before Emily sees fit to restructure things.
Wednesday, October 19, 2005
I should have picked up on the subtle shift in the day's activities when we went shopping at Michael's. At Bed Bath & Beyond, though, I became suspicious. By the time we left Sam's, I felt like Christopher Boone after he'd passed three yellow cars in a row. My fate was sealed it was going to be a bad day.
At first I thought I just had a sinus headache. Such headaches are a common occurrence for me, and I hoped that some Tylenol and a short nap would knock it out. I slept only about 30 minutes, though, and when I woke the pain had grown to a migrane. It hurt against my forehead, behind my eyes, in my ears, on top of my head, and in my neck. I popped a couple more Tylenol and tried to take a hot bath. Unfortunately, lying back only made the pain worse, so I ended up just sitting in the water noting how dirty our tub was.
Misty and I had planned to take Emily to get her Halloween costume when we picked her up from day care, but I had to back out. Instead, I stayed home and threw up a few times. Doing so made me think I might have caught a case of flu, but I guess my body was just trying to shift the pain someplace else.
While my wife and daughter ran their errands, I tried to sleep. I managed to do so, if only lightly. I could hear what was on around me, but I was well enough out of it to ignore everything. When Misty and Emily got home, they came upstairs to check on me for a minute. I remember them coming in the room to get some laundry, but not much else. However, I distinctly recall what happened when they went downstairs. I heard Emily start yelling, "Daad! ... DAAAAAAAD! ... MAAAAT!" On one hand that made me feel a little better, knowing that she missed me. On the other hand it made me feel worse that I couldn't come down and play with her.
Eventually, after Emily had gone to bed, I gingerly made my way downstairs to eat dinner with Misty. She kindly kept the lights dim and talked quietly. At first I wasn't sure if I'd be able to eat, but the meal she made was (as always) delicious, and it helped make me feel a little better.
Today, thankfully, the only remnant of my migrane is a general weariness. When Emily stars screaming "Daaad!" this evening, I'll be right there to blow bubbles for her to chase, build Lego creations for her to knock down, and read Please, Baby, Please a dozen times in a row.
Sunday, October 16, 2005
On the page with coupons for Ivory, Joy, and Basic paper towels the text reads "The Royal Treatment - You don't have to spend a fortune to make your home dazzle."
The next page has coupons for Gain detergent and fabric softener, and the text is "A fresh way to get your clothes Magically Clean."
Finally, the page with the Cheer coupon reads "It doesn't take a magic wand to Keep Your Clothes Looking Like New."
It's a cute campaign, but I'm not sure Cinderella is the best spokesmodel for Proctor & Gamble's products. Case in point: "The Work Song."
Night and day it's Cinderelly
Make the fire, fix the breakfast
Wash the dishes, do the mopping
And the sweeping and the dusting
They always keep her hopping
See what I mean?
Update: Terry Oglesby of Possumblog will also be on the panel.
Saturday, October 15, 2005
The dogs have been boarding at the clinic since we went to the beach last weekend, and I knew Misty had planned to bring them home that afternoon (they hadn't come home yet because they needed haircuts and baths, but Misty has to give clients priority, so our dogs often end up waiting a few days). I had a headache, though, and wasn't in the mood to deal with those two idiots clamoring all over the back seat and crying the whole way home as we drove through Friday afternoon traffic. "You're not bringing the dogs home, are you?," I asked hopefully. Luckily, Misty assured that they would be staying at the clinic another night.
A few minutes later, Misty arrived at my office. As I got in the car, I expressed my relief that the dogs weren't there. Then I heard: "Meow."
She did it. She brought home that cat.
On the bright side, though, it is not going to be called Sucka MC. Misty told me that she'd instead named the cat Padmé. Or, more specifically, Padmé Amidala Skywalker Cuthbert. Her theory is that by being named for Darth Vader's wife, the cat will exude a presence that will eradicate all mice from our home.
Or another way to put it is that she'll tear the house apart until she's found those mice!
Friday, October 14, 2005
However, what I do find amusing is this bit:
Rumored to have also been in the running were British actors Clive Owen, Ioan Gruffudd, Colin Firth, Hugh Grant, Gerard Butler and Ewan McGregor. Irishman Colin Farrell and Australians Hugh Jackman, Heath Ledger and Eric Bana were also mentioned.
What a ridiculous list of names! Clive Owen is the only reasonable actor for the role in the bunch. It's amazing enough that people would speculate about Wolverine and the Hulk, but Colin Firth? Hugh Grant!? How fucking dumb are these people?
How about Daniel Radcliffe while we're at it?
Sunday, October 09, 2005
Yes, we went to Denver last year, but that was for a wedding, not an official vacation. And yes, Misty and I visited New Orleans a couple months ago, but that was just the two of us; Emily wasn't there.
So this weekend was our first vacation trip as a family. We spent two days at the beach in Panama City for a fun and exhausting time.
It will take a while to get all our photos posted online (and many will never be posted as they feature self-conscious parents in swimwear), but here are several that I've managed to get up so far.
Thursday, September 22, 2005
Last weekend I took pictures at the Greek Festival and at Taste of the Summit. The week before that I did the same with Pet-a-Palooza and the Birmingham Zoo's 50th Birthday Celebration. (My apologies that Emily doesn't appear in the galleries. She went to each event with me, and her pictures will be posted later on Flickr.)
This week I've been focused two of the biggest entertainment events of the year in Alabama Big Spring Jam and the Sidewalk Moving Picture Festival. I spent a lot of time putting together iPod festival guides for each, so please download them.
Jam Guide ... Sidewalk Guide
Before you tell me that you don't have an iPod, click here and sign up to get a free iPod Nano (this really works I've recieved a 20G iPod and a 1G Shuffle from these offers already). Even if you don't want one, you can at least help me get mine. That way, with the Nano's color graphics capabilities, I can start adding nifty site maps and other pictures to the event guides.
Thursday, September 08, 2005
Saturday, September 03, 2005
I've been saturated with hurricane news over the past few days. When something huge like this happens, I have to put aside my usual entertainment production duties and focus on the bigger picture. But it goes beyond just me putting in overtime and helping with news production. The staff of NOLA.com (one of al.com's sister sites) is displaced from their city. They're scattered in different places around the country and can't return home at a time when their site's traffic is going insane with people trying to get information. So we've been helping them where we can.
Anyway, I'm getting 8-12 hours a day of Katrina. That's not a complaint I'm happy to do it. This isn't one of those sensational but inconsequential stories that you get sick of hearing about it's just exhausting. There are so many things I'm thinking, but I'm counting on others to put the words out there. After everything I've seen and read, I don't feel like adding something more to the pile.
Wednesday, August 31, 2005
Our power went out in the storm Monday night. It stayed out for 22 hours. We lost a few things from the freezer and refrigerator, but I figure that if that's the worst we suffered, then we got off pretty easy.
Misty's mom cooked us dinner last night because it's Misty's birthday today. Wanting to check if the power was back on before we went home, we called over to our house to see if the answering machine would pick up. It did. When we got home, there was an excited message from Misty exclaiming "power!"
Monday, August 29, 2005
Me: "I'd like to make an apointment for today."
Receptionist: "OK. With which doctor?"
Me: "Dr. Bullock."
Receptionist: "Dr. Bullock is only working a half day today, and he's already booked up."
Me: "Then can I make an appointment with Dr. Copeland?"
Receptionist: "No, Dr. Copeland was on vacation last week, so she's all booked up today."
Me (thinking): Then why the hell didn't you say so in the first place, you nitwit?! Can't you hear that I'm breaking into coughing fits every time I try to speak?!
Me (reality): silence
Receptionist: "Would you like to make an apointment for tomorrow?"
Monday, August 22, 2005
If anyone would be interested in joining me there tomorrow night, let me know. I'm going to take photos for al.com, but my usual date (see the blonde in the post below) can't make it.
Well, I went by myself (boo hoo). Here are the pictures.
Saturday, August 20, 2005
Today, I had planned to use my time to get some real work done, banging out event listings from all the things that have been submitted to al.com's entertainment calendars. However, I've just discovered that the calendar tool is broken, so I'll probably have to wait until Monday for one of the techs in New Jersey to fix it.
Since I have a free moment, here are some pictures of Emily helping with the dishes.
Friday, August 19, 2005
I can see what she's trying to do. She thinks she can trick me into reading her textbook so that I'll help her with her class. I'm not falling for it. I'll proofread her papers for her, and I'll share my thoughts on any communications subjects I'm already familiar with, but I'm not going to go so far as to jump back into reading and research. If I wanted to do that, I'd register for grad school.
Thursday, August 18, 2005
Luckily the igniter didn't work, because as Misty pointed out, she could just picture a flaming mouse running through the open door and setting the house on fire. I was charged with the task of confronting the mouse and turning the gas off, and Misty went inside to cook the sausages on the stove, vowing to wheel the grill out in the yard and scrub it down before ever using it again.
Today she called me at work to inform me that we're adopting a cat. "I know you'll say 'no'," she said, "but I'm bringing it home anyway."
"No," I said.
"It's too late, I've already decided," she told me. "He'll live outside, so it won't be a problem. He'll catch mice."
I'm allergic to animal dander, but that's not really the issue that concerns me. My disapproval stems from the fact that we've already got two dogs that drive us crazy. We really shouldn't have them considering our general lack of enthusiasm for their companionship, but there's that attachment you form before they're a pain in the ass, and you can't quite manage to shake it. Getting another pet, though, doesn't seem like a step in the right direction.
"We're getting this cat," Misty continued. "I already promised the vet I'd take him. I'm going to call him Sucka MC."
"No," I said.
"Isn't that a great name for a cat?" she asked, undaunted.
"We're not getting a cat, and you're not naming him Sucka MC."
I finally worked my position to compromise that we could get the cat if Misty would agree to part with the shih tzus. Every time I mentioned this option, though, she acted as if she didn't hear it.
Monday, August 15, 2005
In my dream I was standing in my living room when the doorbell rang. I was only wearing boxers and a t-shirt, so I didn't answer right away. Instead, I was hoping someone else would get it. When the bell rang again, I sort of tapped on the door to let whoever it was know that I'd be with them in a moment. I looked up the stairs where my brother was, thinking he'd come down and get the door for me, but instead he walked into my bedroom. I didn't get the impression that he was ignoring me just that he was going to do something else first. But not wanting to make the person outside wait any longer, I gave up hope of modesty and opened the door.
Instantly, someone rushed me and smashed me on the right side of my head with a sledgehammer. My body immediately hit the floor. I didn't see my attacker, and I didn't have time to react. It just happened so fast. In the following two seconds before I felt myself lose consciousness, several thoughts flew through my mind: I needed to warn my family that someone was in the house. I was worried for the safety of Misty and Emily. I needed to let them know that I'd been seriously hurt so that they could come to my aid. I knew that I was dying. And I gave thought to the state of the world in the news and something about cheesecake and a compass.
That last part is weird considering the scope of things, and I wouldn't bother mentioning it except that I don't want to overlook anything that might have some significance. As I said, all these thoughts flitted through my head in only a couple of seconds. After that, I screamed for help four times. The first two times, nothing came out, and as I tried, I feared that I would not be able to alert my family of the impending danger. The next two times woke me up, though, as I hollered, "Help me! Help me!"
For the rest of the night, I didn't sleep much. In fact, I was afraid to go to sleep. I was so unslettled from that blind rush of terror. Every creak in the house had me on edge. As I lay in bed I thought about going to see my physician about the dream. Or a psychiatrist. Or a fortune teller. I wondered if our house was haunted, causing me to have bad dreams. I thought about calling the previous owners and asking them why they'd moved if they'd had similar nightmares. I wondered if the soup I'd had for dinner could have caused any of this.
Aside from the fact that I was attacked with a sledgehammer, two things continue to unsettle me about this dream. For one thing, whenever I dream about being at home, I'm at the house in which I lived in Houston. I assume the reason for this consistency is that I spent more time living in that house than any other (with the exception of an earlier house in Houston, but I was too young to remember it well). With this dream, though, I was in the house where I now reside. That element made the dream more real, and it troubles me that the shift to my current home would coencide with such a horrible event. The other thing that bothers me is that this is the second dream I've had within a month in which I've been murdered (the other time involving being shot in the head point-blank while being held as a hostage in a bookstore or restaurant).
Should I be worried about this sort of thing? Should I seek out professional help? At the moment, I'm inclined to see if it happens again before rushing off to see a psychiatrist. Two incidents is a coincendece, but three would signal something more significant, I think.
I quickly realized why Winn Dixie is going out of business. Even at 30% off, most of their items were still a little more than I usually pay at Bruno's.
For some reason people have the impression that Winn Dixie is a less expensive grocery chain, but it's not true. Their stores just look like they ought to be because they're always so dingy and poorly lit.
It took 56 minutes for someone to e-mail a complaint.
Once I searched for it online, I felt pretty stupid about my initial guesses. My first suggestion was that it meant "I'm a Democrat," and my second guess was that it meant "I'm from Kentucky."
Saturday, August 13, 2005
Wednesday, August 10, 2005
I wasn't neglected for too long, though. We both sat down on the couch to regale the adventures of our vacation, while Emily lunged back and forth repeatedly between the two of us, hugging Mommy then Daddy, Mommy then Daddy...
Best welcome I've ever received.
America Online and Microsoft are hitting spammers where it hurts most: They are confiscating their assets and giving them away.
AOL, the world's largest Internet service provider, is awarding $20,000 in gold bars, a 2003 Hummer H2 and $75,000 in cash it seized from a major spammer as part of a legal settlement last year. It will hold a sweepstakes on its Web site starting Wednesday.
Meanwhile, Microsoft on Tuesday said Scott Richter, once considered one of the world's top spammers, and his company, OptInRealBig.com, agreed to pay $7 million under a legal settlement. Microsoft is donating $1 million to a New York program to provide computer gear to community centers. It will spend $5 million more on anti-spam efforts.
"We think it's justice," says Curtis Lu, AOL deputy general counsel. "We're taking the ill-gotten bounty these spammers have earned off the backs of our customers and handing it back to customers."
What a load of crap.
AOL isn't "handing it back to customers." They're using this as a marketing ploy, attempting to lure in even more suckers to their net with the hopes of winning a raffle.
Now, I realize that with 24 million U.S. subscribers, AOL would only be able to refund each person's bill by about a half-cent based on the spam assets they acquired. So doing that isn't really practical, but their chosen route is sleazy.
Microsoft, though, is donating their winnings to charity. Kudos to Microsoft.
Friday, August 05, 2005
But before anyone gets the idea that my excessive driving is a gross contributor to Birmingham's ozone problem, let me say in my defense that my wife and I carpool to work, and I'm usually the one who drives. Also, I drive a Jetta, not some preposterous monstrosity of an SUV.
Thursday, August 04, 2005
List ten songs that you are currently digging... it doesn't matter what genre they are from, whether they have words, or even if they're no good, but they must be songs you're really enjoying right now. Post these instructions, the artists, and the ten songs in your blog. Then tag five other people to see what they're listening to.
They Might Be Giants - Damn Good Times - "I've got a friend who's a natural dancer / You could call her a jumpin' bean / She's got ants in her pants and she's gonna dance." This is totally Emily's song, and she does indeed love to dance to it.
Coldplay - Fix You - I love when the guitar kicks in about 2½ minutes into the song.
The Donnas - Fall Behind Me - Lyrically, the album is pretty weak, but if you let the music flow through you instead of trying to absorb it, you can just enjoy the fact that these ladies rock.
Death Cab for Cutie - Transatlanticism - Misty brought my attention back to this one. I love the way it starts out so somber and just builds in intensity over 8 minutes.
Grant Lee Buffalo - Dixie Drug Store - Because I'm headed to New Orleans this weekend. It's a song about meeting the ghost of "Voodoo Queen" Marie Laveau.
Rilo Kiley - Spectacular Views - This one goes on my "Special Monday Morning Mix" (see Barry/Jack Black in "High Fidelity"). It really peps me up, and "it's so fucking beautiful."
Fountains of Wayne - All Kinds of Time - Who'd have thought I'd love a song about a football game?
N.W.A. - Straight Outta Compton - I read an article recently that mentioned how it's difficult to explain to kids who know Ice Cube from "Barbershop" and "Are We There Yet?" that he used to be one scary motherfucker. That prompted me to revisit some of N.W.A.'s music.
Blackalicious - Passion - Because the aforementioned song made me realize that I need to listen to more hip-hop.
Michael Tolcher - Mission Responsibile - His whole album is great, but I can't pull myself away from this one. I'm looking forward to seeing him again at Big Spring Jam.
Snow Patrol - Chocolate - It seems that I'm always digging some song or another from this album.
The Flaming Lips - Turn it On - I've been trying to download this song for almost a year, and I finally found someone who had it (yeah, shiver me timbers and all that).
Looks like I couldn't limit myself to 10.
Lindsey - because this is just the sort of meme she should enjoy
Leslie - so I can see how she's coming along since she made her plea for new music suggestions
Hubie - because he's probably listening to something I haven't heard of that I'll like
Jeff - because I just discovered his blog, and I refuse to believe he only listens to Glen Phillips
Kara - so that she can post more than once in a month (like I'm one to talk)
Monday, August 01, 2005
Currently, Emily only requires her pacifier when she goes to bed, but Misty and I have said that we want to wean Emily off it entirely by the time she's 18 months old. To do so, we figure she needs a replacement security fixture like a blanket or a stuffed animal.
We've begun leaving both in the crib with Emily at night so that she'll get used to having them there. Emily has decided, though, that she does not want to share her bed with an animal.
Usually, when we put her down for the night, she's wide awake. She's pretty good about it though, playing with her aquarium and babbling to herself occasionally until she falls asleep. Only rarely does she cry out for us once she's in bed.
Over the past couple weeks, Misty and I have been peering around the doorway of Emily's room to observe her bedtime ritual. In doing so, we've learned that the first thing she does after we leave the room is to grab her stuffed animal, stand up, and drop it out of the crib. She'll then plop down immediately into her sleeping position (head down, butt up in the air).
After seeing her do this several days in a row, we thought that perhaps she didn't like that particular animal. We switched from the big ladybug to a pink bunny, and for the first night it worked. The bunny was still in the crib with her in the morning. The next night though, it was back to the routine of dropping the animal out of the crib.
So, we don't know if she doesn't like sleeping with a stuffed animal, or if we just haven't found the right one yet, or if she's just being defiant. Her rejection sure is funny to watch, though.
For the past several years, I've attemted to just read one book a month, yet somehow I always fall short of my goal. Last year and the year before, I managed ten.
Prey by Michael Crichton
Tricky Business by Dave Barry
Left Behind by Tim LaHaye & Jerry B. Jenkins
The DaVinci Code by Dan Brown
Harry Potter & the Goblet of Fire by J.K. Rowling
Babyhood by Paul Reiser
Hey Nostradamus! by Douglas Copeland
Songbook by Nick Hornby
Dude, Where's My Country? by Michael Moore
Lost by Gregory Maguire
Lies (and the Lying Liars Who Tell Them) by Al Franken
Life of Pi by Yan Martel
Sleeping with the Angel by Nick Hornby (editor)
The Watermelon King by Daniel Wallace
Blankets by Craig Thompson *
A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning by Lemony Snicket *
Eats, Shoots & Leaves by Lynne Truss
Coraline by Neil Gaiman *
We're Just Like You, Only Prettier by Celia Rivenbark
My Sister's Keeper by Jodi Picoult
Off Ramp by Hank Stuever
We've Got Blog by Rebecca Blood (editor)
Little Children by Tom Perrotta
* does not count toward goal
If I allowed graphic novels or junior fiction to count toward my goal, I'd have made it last year. But it's not meeting the goal itself that I'm concerned about I don't get a prize if I accomplish it I just want to read more. Nevertheless, most of the books on my list aren't that profound. I mean, I read Left Behind, for God's sake (it was so terrible).
Oddly enough, while I don't count books like Coraline or A Series of Unfortunate Events, since I consider them primarily to be children's books, I do allow Harry Potter to count toward my goal (hey, it's more than 800 pages).
This year, I'm on track to miss the mark again as I'm only in the middle of my sixth book after seven months.
How to Be Good by Nick Hornby
Spam Kings by Brian McWilliams
The Untelling by Tayari Jones
Never Let You Go by Kazuo Ishiguro
Harry Potter & the Order of the Phoenix by J.K. Rowling
Everything Bad is Good for You by Steven Johnson
I am determined to keep trying, though. I read faster when I like the book (and I have a tendency to keep muddling through despite not liking it), so hopefully the rest of my selections this year will be enjoyable. So far, only Hornby's How to Be Good has dragged me down, but it made for a very slow start to the year.
Sunday, July 31, 2005
We've been loosely planning three different vacations for a while now to Destin, New Orleans, and Boston but suddenly it looks like we're going to have a much tougher time pulling any of them off. Since two of her classes are held only once a week, missing either a Monday or a Wednesday puts her a week behind in either of those classes (and half a week behind in her Mon/Wed class). The beach is probably still doable, as it's a quick trip down there, and we can stay just a few days and be satisfied. New England, on the other hand, requires a more substantial commitment, because we have to factor in time to visit all of my relatives up there. So it seems unlikely that we'll be able to pull off that trip this year.
Faced with the fast-approaching start of UAB's fall semester, Misty and I have decided to squeeze in our New Orleans vacation next weekend. It's short notice, but we're not going to be able to manage it otherwise. We had hoped to go in a few months when it's not so ungodly hot and humid, but at least this is the off-season, and rates are lower.
I've never been to New Orleans. In fact, the city has never appealed to me. Like Vegas, the overtones of sin, excess, and flamboyance just aren't my cup of tea. Yet now, with our impending trip only a few days away, I find myself very excited about it.
Neither tale is for the faint of heart, but I think Misty's got Robin beat.
Thursday, July 28, 2005
Wednesday, July 27, 2005
Together we worked on cleaning up the clutter from our bedroom a project that has been looming for nearly a year. We washed laundry, vacuumed, mopped the kitchen, cleaned the bathtub, and put together a new bookshelf. Having accomplished all that, we felt much more satisfied, I think, than we would have if we'd gone to the movies.
As our busy morning turned into a lazy afternoon, I finished the fifth Harry Potter book so that I can finally join the rest of the world on the new one.
Misty pulled me away just as I was finishing so we could head over to UAB. I don't think I've mentioned here that Misty has decided to go back to school to finish her degree in communications management. As she pointed out yesterday, this has been kind of a whirlwind decision. She met with an advisor a couple weeks ago to discuss the possibility, and within an hour she applied for readmission and plotted out what classes she'd need to take. This week, she found out that she had indeed been accepted, so today she went to sign up for classes and buy books. She's taking two classes: one Monday and Wednesday afternoons and one Wednesday nights, so she'll only be home late one night a week.
I have no doubt that after a five-year break, it's going to be difficult for Misty to get back into the swing of things as far as school goes. She's still going to be working full time, and of course her job as "mom" never lets up. Nevertheless, I know she can do it, and I know she's going to be so much happier once she does. I'm very proud of her for making this commitment.
Tuesday, July 26, 2005
I did spot a couple of young raccoons, though, who were sitting on a rock only a few feet from me as I came up the trail. One of them arched its back and kept its eyes on me as I stood and watched. Having no intention of getting closer, and seeing that they were too nervous to carry on with their activities while I was around, I moved on. After a few more feet, I turned back and saw that they'd hastened up a tree while my back was turned. They were still watching me intently.
As I neared the end of the blue trail where it intersects with white, I took a path out of the woods toward the top of the mountain where the power lines are. Two weeks ago, I'd walked back to the parking lot this way after I'd completed both the red and white trails. I'd been exhausted, and thought it would be a quick route out. It wasn't. It was still probably a mile or so back to the parking lot which doesn't seem like much, but consider that this was late morning in the middle of the summer, I'd already hiked a couple of miles over hills and rocks, and unlike the trails through the woods, there are no trees to shade you along the path where the power lines reside. The nice part about the power line trail, though, is that it's lined with wildflowers. They're much more plentiful there where they can acually get some sun. There are also scores of blackberry vines, so hungry as I was, I helped myself to several berries as I walked along.
This past weekend, while my parents were visiting, we all went over to the Preserve to pick blackberries. However, all the vines near the entrance are well picked over, and you have to walk a long way down the path before you find large amounts of berries. Since it was afternoon, and we had Emily with us, we didn't go very far. No one else had been there before, though, so the collective assumption was that the berries had "gone by" for the season. I knew this wasn't the case, but it didn't much matter, as we couldn't have stayed long or walked far anyway.
So today, my goal was to return to the spot where I'd been two weeks ago and pick enough berries to proove that they were indeed plentiful. Once I reaced the clearing I didn't have to look far. I set about filling up the container I'd brought with me, and after about 20 minutes, I'd nearly done so. In fact, I didn't even move beyond the first patch of vines that I came to.
Now completely drenched in sweat from the heat, I began my trek back. This time, I didn't make the same mistake as before; I stuck to the trail through the woods in order to stay in the shade. The walk back was of course, much more strenuous than the walk there. And now back at home, I notice that I have tiny cuts all over my hands from thorns. But the blackberry cobbler Misty bakes tomorrow will make it well worth the effort.
Sunday, July 24, 2005
I blame its shutdown on myself because of two stupid things I did (or did not do). First, I did not change the air filter for about 3 or 4 months. In fact, for a week prior to the air conditioner's demise, I thought to myself repeatedly, "I need to change that filter." But each time I thought about it, I neglected to actually do it.
My second blunder was a bit more complicated. On Tuesday, Misty called and asked me to open the windows and try to air out the house a bit. When I did, I shut off the air, and turned the system's central fan on. A few hours later, when the heat became unbearable in the house, I shut the windows and turned the air back on. I did not remember to turn the fan off, however. As such, the air ran continuously for about 36 hours until Misty discovered my mistake.
By this time, the air duct was coated in ice and the hose had become very hot and stuffy. We put buckets and towels down on the floor, and shut the unit off for a couple hours while we waited for the ice to melt. Once the ice was gone, though, the air conditioner kept on leaking. So much so, in fact, that we thought the buckets would overflow in the night if we kept it running. So we shut it back down and braced ourselves for an uncomfortable night.
Now if it wasn't bad enough that I'd caused the air conditioner to break down, something else made me look like even more of a dumb ass. Last year when our home warranty came up for renewal, I chose not to renew it. Misty didn't agree with my decision, but I held that even if an appliance did break, it would be less expensive to get fixed than to keep paying the insurance probably. My assumption came from the fact that we'd already had the air conditioner fixed three times, finally ending with the warranty folks installing a new unit for us. I figured that with a brand new unit, it was a safe bet that it wasn't going to break down for at least a few years.
So it broke down. I caused it. And I caused us to not have a warranty to get it fixed. So I was pretty much screwed. Misty didn't have to say "I told you so" for me to know she was thinking it. I was determined to fix this thing myself so that I could get out of the doghouse.
Thursday when I got home from work, the first thing I did was change the filter. As I expected, it was chock full of dust. The dripping water started right back up when I turned the air on, though, so obviously it wasn't going to be that easy. Next I went outside to see if I could clear out the drain, but I didn't have the tools to get into it more than a couple of feet, and it didn't seem clogged there anyway. So I went back inside to the closet unit, and I pulled out all the pvc pipe.
Looking at the pipes, I could immediately tell that this was where the problem lay. They were totally clogged with dirt and dust. I used a coat hanger, a couple of old toothbrushes and the hose to knock out as much gunk as I could. It was just disgusting how much sludge poured out of those pipes. But with Misty's help, I got them all clean, and I installed them back into the closet.
Finally came the moment of truth. I turned the air back on and waited by the buckets for the dripping to begin. But it didn't. I'd fixed it.
Better yet, I didn't call a repair technician, and I didn't read the instructions. My manhood remains intact.
Saturday, July 23, 2005
But Emily doesn't discriminate. In fact, everything is "hey, doggie" these days. When she sees a cat in the neighborhood, she says "hey, doggie" to it. When we read a book about animals, half of them get a greeting of "hey doggie" (and some even get hugs). When we go to the zoo, the animals all get to hear her exclaim, "hey, doggie!" You can imagine what it's like when she visits Misty at work, and there really are a bunch of honest-to-goodness doggies around. Sometimes Emily even refers to Misty or me as "hey, doggie."
It's frustrating, because you're so excited when your child finally starts to call you "Mama" and "Daddy," yet she's happy to abandon that for a name which she obviously holds in much greater esteem.
Her new habbit, though, is calling me "Matt." Obviously she's picked it up from Misty, and we've now realized why so many parents talk like idiots, referring to each other constantly as "Mommy" and "Daddy."
Just yesterday when we were picking Emily up after work, she looked at me and said "Mama." I corrected her, saying, "no, I'm Daddy." She responded with, "MATT!"
The problem is that Misty finds this development quite amusing, stiffling giggles whenever Emily says "Matt." Of course, Emily's not calling her "Misty." So Misty taunts me with it, purposely referring to me as "Matt" in front of Emily, thus strenthening our daughter's misguided belief that she should call me by my first name.
But I suppose it's better than "hey, doggie."
Thursday, July 21, 2005
At my checkup, I found out that my sight has worsened in both eyes. My left eye went from -6.5 to -7.0 and my right eye dipped from -6.5 to -7.5. This is the first time I've had a different prescription for each eye, so now I finally have to pay attention that I put the right contact in the right eye.
As I was waiting the requisite hour between the time of my apointment and the time I actually got to see the doctor, I considered heading back out to my car to get my coupon book. I had a feeling that there might have been a coupon in there for the Wal-Mart Vision Center. However, since most of the coupons in the book have proven useless, I didn't bother. For instance, the Wal-Mart coupons include "Free Cookie" (something Bruno's does every day), "Free Balloon" (another something Bruno's does every day), "Free lifetime rotation with purchase of tires" (something Wal-Mart already offers without a coupon). I figured if there was anything for the vision center in there, it was probably something like 5% off an exam, and I didn't bother going out to check.
So I have my exam, I pay the $50 exam fee and the $30 fitting fee (What the hell is that? Just tell me it's $80; don't try to fool me by saying an exam is only $50.) and I go home. At home I flip through the coupon book to find a coupon for "Free vision screening." Shit. "Vision screening" better not mean the same thing as "eye exam," or I just wasted $50. Knowing Wal-Mart, it's not the same thing, but it's probably best for me not to think about it just in case.
If your teenager complains of a sore throat and wants to see the doctor, don't just hand him a cough drop.
That cold might really be chlamydia.
Whoa! That'll cue up the paranoia.
Wednesday, July 20, 2005
I'd never heard of the stuff, but according to Misty all Southerners know about it, particularly older Southerners. In fact, that's what she and her family were planning on hunting for at the farmer's market this weekend.
As it turns out, field corn isn't just a tasty side dish, it could be the future of fuel consumption!
In general, current U.S. ethanol production is based largely on the starch in kernels of field corn, the nation's largest agricultural crop. (The predominant use of field corn is for animal feed. Current ethanol production uses only about 7% of the crop.) Any starch or sugar crop, however, can now be used to make ethanol.
As commercialization of advanced bioethanol technology makes possible ethanol production from biomass other than starch and sugar, vast additional resources will become available to supplement ethanol production from corn kernels.
It'll be just like in "Back to the Future" when Doc Brown threw that banana peel into the "Mr. Fusion" on his Delorian.
She's always loved music and dancing (I say that like she's 15 years old instead of 15 months), but it's interesting to see which particular songs strike her fancy. Some of her other favorites include "Yeah" by Usher, "Hey Baby" by No Doubt, and "Here in Higglytown" from They Might Be Giants.
Tuesday, July 19, 2005
The party turned out to be an amazing event. They had everything turned into scenes from the Harry Potter novels from platform 9¾ at the entrance, to food in the Great Hall, to books for sale at Flourish & Blotts and that was before you even got past the lobby. When you entered the museum itself, you were given a Marauder's Map to explain the layout and schedule of event. Once inside, you could put on the sorting hat and be placed into the house of your choice (most kids picked Griffindor). You could take classes in arithmancy, care of magical creatures, potions, and charms. You could get your face painted or make a wand at Olivander's. Many of the coodinators were in costume. I saw Professors Dumbledore, McGonagal, Quirrell, and Trelawney. Also Hagrid, Mrs. Weasley, and Rita Skeeter. The folks at McWane really went all out, and they put on an impressive show.
But as good of a job as they did, what struck me even more was the crowd. That place was packed. And so many people were dressed up both kids and adults for the night they became wizards, witches, quidditch players, house elves, and dementors. There was a real excitement in the air, and I think everybody felt it.
After a couple hours there, it dawned on me why I was having such a good time. Where I'd really wanted to be last weekend was in San Diego for Comic-Con International. And what I've always loved about that convention is the people. When you're in an exhibit hall with 80,000 other people who are all there for the same thing, you feel like you're part of something really important and special. At home, you're just a geek who reads comic books, but there, you realize that everyone else does too they're like you, and they're not all weirdos.
That's how it felt at the Harry Potter party. I didn't feel a bit like a dork for being an adult who enjoys the Harry Potter books. There were tons of adults there who were in the same boat. We relished the evening; we cheered when the clock struck midnight; and we went home exhausted and smiling.
So you've decided to kill yourself but you just don't know how to say "goodbye?"
SENTI-MENTAL GREETING CARD CO., the first name in last words, announces the release of "Suicidal Sentiments." ...
The 12-card "Suicidal Sentiments" series offers a range of commonly repressed thoughts, feelings and emotions commonly held by suicidal persons. The series is surprisingly direct and cleverly written from the suicide's perspective, an innovative first in this "hush-hush" society of suicide and mental illness.
It goes on and on (as press releases tend to do) with quotes from the creator and such, but I think you get the idea already. Then, in order to avoid hate mail from people saying the business is tactless, it closes saying that they "will be donating 25% of all sales to local and national suicide prevention programs."
Of course if the prevention programs work, no one would need to buy the cards.
Monday, July 18, 2005
Emily had another bout of teething this week. Saturday night when Misty went out to dinner with her cousin, I stayed home with Emily while she cried and cried. At first we thought she was getting sick because she was extra fussy, she had a fever, and she didn't want to eat or drink much. She also began holding her hands behind her back, walking around with them clasped together like she's some professor pondering her lecture. Misty mentioned this to her boss, and he suggested that Emily might have a kidney infection which would lead to both the fever and her back hurting.
Luckily, though, it was just teething (you weren't worried because I mentioned that at the start), and she's got a big new molar now. We had a couple of bad nights where she didn't sleep well, and we ended up bringing her to bed with us. However, Emily still didn't quite sleep instead she fidgeted back and forth, climbing on us but at least she didn't fuss. In the morning, I woke (I say that I woke, but I never really slept) to find Emily's feet on my pillow and her head burried under the quilt. What a weird kid. Of course, she usually sleeps with her butt sticking up in the air, so I shouldn't be surprised.
The business of her walking around with her hands behind her back continues, so I still don't know what that's about. Maybe she's just fascinated by the fact that she can touch her hands together behind her. Whatever it is, she's not acting like she's in pain.
I'm thinking about creating more of these sorts of files soon kind of like mini travel guides for Alabama cities. They'll be on al.com as soon as I can figure out how to publish zip files.
It would be really nifty if I could make a little map that would show up on the screen, but since my iPod is an older version without image capabilities, I'd be unable to check my work to see what it looks like. For now, though, I'm pleased with this.
Sunday, July 17, 2005
Cathy: "Each episode they investigate old homicides using new forensic evidence and stuff like that."
Misty: "Do they ever solve any?"
Tuesday, June 21, 2005
One of Birmingham's finest plays a game at the PS2 booth.
Lampwick was the best new band I heard.
Children dance to the music of the Imagination Movers.
Kids cool off in the water in Linn Park.
Emily and Mommy hang out in the children's area.
Emily goes cruising for trouble.
Emily tries to borrow Daddy's media pass so she can get backstage.
Dad and Emily enjoy Father's Day in Linn Park.
Rachael Yamagata and the cellist from her band.
Ryan Adams made it difficult for the news media to take photos.
Saturday, June 18, 2005
Monday, June 06, 2005
Will Lynette find a new job? It's not much of a cliffhanger, but I have the perfect solution: She could go to work as the producer for Sports Night (it was another ABC show, after all). Oh, how happy that would make me.
Saturday, May 28, 2005
Thursday, May 19, 2005
She's coming with me to work tomorrow for our company picnic. I can only imagine what sort of havoc she's going to unleash upon the office during the couple hours before we head off to Oak Mountain.
I've also posted my review of the movie over at Get on with Your Nightlife.
Pregnant student banned from graduation walks stage anyway
Alysha Cosby waited four years to hear her name called at her high school graduation.
When it wasn't, she took matters into her own hands.
After the last graduate was asked to come forward to receive his degree at St. Jude Educational Institute's commencement Tuesday night, Cosby announced her own name and walked across the stage. ...
Her decision to do so prompted cheers and applause from many of her fellow seniors and dozens of people in the church. Some, however, murmured that her act was in poor taste and that it took away from the ceremony.
Took away from the ceremony? Give me a break! What about taking away from her ceremony?
Cosby didn't ask for the spotlight. All she wanted was equal treatment. If they'd given her that, no one ever would have noticed her. But since they weren't willing to grant her equality, she decided to aim for something a bit higher. Good for her!
Besides, graduations are even more boring than high school itself. Cosby did those people a favor by throwing a wrench into the machine.
Wednesday, May 18, 2005
Tomorrow at work, I'll be putting together a photo gallery of fans who are dressed up waiting in line for Star Wars. If you take any digital photos of such fans, and wouldn't mind sharing them with al.com, please let me know! Thanks!
Friday, May 13, 2005
Thursday, May 12, 2005
Since I haven't watched a single episode of "Idol" this season, I can't really say that I'm "excited," but it's cool that I get to attend the event, nonetheless.
Monday, May 09, 2005
Update: The Birmingham News has deleted the story they wrote (I don't know why) from their Breaking News weblog, so I've removed the link. However, Ryan Adams' web site and PollStar both list the concert.
I run anti-spyware software from Ad-aware and Spybot every week, but there's still stuff on my computer. What worries me is that previously when I've run these programs, there is usually a new update every week or so. However, over the past month at least, each have returned a message saying that no new updates are available. This seems fishy.
I think that the spyware folks may have found a way around the anti-spyware software. My guess is that there's something on my computer that's telling the Ad-aware and Spybot programs that there are no new updates available, when there really are. Either that, or there is something telling them to exclude certain files from their searches.
Has anyone heard of such things happening? Is there a solution?
Monday, May 02, 2005
However, that doesn't mean that I won't be able to go and since Misty isn't a fan of Rilo Kiley in the first place, and would only be going for the sake of accompanying me, I don't need to feel guilty about going without her.
I don't want to go by myself, though. Is there anyone out there who'd be interested in joining me at the show? I'm trying to find out soon whether I'll be going because I anticipate tickets will sell out.
The concert starts at 8 p.m. Tickets are $12. Okkervil River and The Brunettes are the opening bands
Thursday, April 28, 2005
Wednesday, April 27, 2005
As I've mentioned before, Misty has developed an addiction for Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab. She orders perfumes online based on vivid, flowery descriptions. But buying perfume without smelling it first can be tricky. Sometimes "Blackened sandalwood and misty lavender, with curling wisps of smoky tobacco, nag champa, and labdanum" doesn't smell as pleasant as she thinks it will, and she wishes that she'd ordered something simpler like "Sugar Cookie." When that happens, she arranges a trade with another BPAL addict, each relinquishing scents they don't care for in exchange for something new they want to try.
That's what I was supposed to be mailing today.
When the woman at the post office counter asked me the standard question about whether my package contained anything breakable, perishible, liquid, hazardous, etc., I naïvely answered, "it's perfume." I was then informed that you cannot mail perfume because it is flamable.
Now, correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't paper also flamable? I mean, I know perfume is flamable, but it doesn't exactly self-combust. Sure it's going to burn if you get it near flame, but I think that if you get a mail bag near a flame you're pretty much screwed anyway.
I didn't give the postal clerks a hard time, though. I knew there would be no point. I just took the package and went on my way.
I'll just go to the Homewood post office tomorrow and answer "no" this time.
Tuesday, April 26, 2005
Oh well, he was no longer any concern.
A few mintues later I came to a school zone, and a cop pulled out in front of me and turned out his lights. I'd had time to slow down to the posted speed limit, so I knew I wasn't in trouble. Misty said, "Wouldn't it be great if he were going after the guy who passed you?" Indeed it would be. And that's exactly who the cop nailed.
Since I'd been going about 40 mph before I slowed down, the guy who passed me must have been doing at least 45 20 mph over the limit in a school zone. Ah, wonderful karma.